Saturday, March 19, 2005

It's official. I hate March break.

The mall this week has been just dreadful, and I can't escape it, because I work there. It's a zoo of bored kids and rude parents and nice-but-kinda-clueless teenagers making out in the corners of the store. Yesterday the cops took some guy out in handcuffs. He'd been harrassing these two fifteen year old girls. Yeugh. I was really glad that they said something to one of the staff, but I hate that someone was there following them around and kissing them on the cheeks and demanding their phone numbers. There's not enough ew in the world. To add insult to injury, they're from, I dunno, Ajax or something and the police drove them home, and you just know their parents are never going to let them come to Toronto again, which especially sucks since they looked like the kind of freaky kids who are counting the days until they can go live somewhere where most of the other people don't match their socks to their scrunchies.

The adventure today was the couple of guys sitting in the corner. One of them had been there yesterday too and engaged me in a long and pointless "conversation" about my job. I was irritated that he was back, because he addressed me like I was some kind of old friend (I hate nametags) and clearly he thought this was going to impress me. "You didn't think I'd remember you!" he said, all cheerful, and I thought "No, and I can't tell you how incredibly creepy it is that you do." The nice loss prevention people nabbed them for some petty shoplifting and then for extra points discovered that one of them had a big wooden club--the kind truck drivers use to test the air pressure in their tires. Yay, concealed weaponry!

I won't even go into the horror of the Spongebob Squarepants guest appearance in our kids' section, or the Radio Free Roscoe signing that the mall was hosting. (Recall the screaming you've seen in all that old footage of the Beatles, with girls fainting--yeah, that. For two hours on Thursday morning.)

And it's not over, oh no, because although all the private schools and the 905 area code had their March break this week, the Toronto District School Board has theirs in the week coming up. Too bad I can't call in irritable.

3 comments:

Jennifer Jane Whiteford said...

Who the hell is Radio Free Roscoe? How can people be fainting over a band that I've never ever heard of?

And I share your March Break Pain. I was stuck with 23 spring-feverish March Break children all week and it wasn't pretty.

J.

'col said...

I only wish Radio Free Roscoe was a band. alas, it is a children's tv show.

I suppose it makes me a hypocrite to be too sarcastic about it though, since today I found out that Debbie Travis is coming to my store in April, and I did a little happy dance in my meeting, much to the amusement of my co-workers.

I will never be cool.

Adam said...

I worked on that bloody show. I will probably have to change that to present tense if it gets picked up for a third season (will Travis really move away will Lilly and Ray's new relationship survive her mall tour with No Man's Land, will all the characters continue to be basically unlikeable and motivated by selfishness? ).

The producers were actually planning a mall tour (there was talk of renting Skydome) but that was aborted as the show's composer explained the amount of work that went into to pitch correcting the vocals. And (drummer excepted) lack of profiency with their instruments.